Selective hearing + Brutal honesty

Trying to establish "who's in charge" with a spirited child has proven to be very difficult. Luckily for all involved, Mya has been blessed with sharing her life with an equally spirited mommy! I can go all day and night establishing rules, setting boundaries, loving, having fun, and of course dancing.

But this post is about the hard part, discipline. It is so hard to discipline and be consistent, but we are seeing the fruits of our labor. One of the down sides of being so consistent is that Mya has started repeating back to me catch phrases such as:

These are the rules.

Do you hear me?

Are you making good choices?

Here's the thing (followed by rule, rule, rule).

Sophie, HUSH!

Are you listening to me?

Last night, after 4 returns to the bed, we break out the big guns. "If you get out of bed again, you will lose all your binkies. It's your choice. Do you hear me?"

Mya tips her head to the side, "I don't wanna hear you."

High Shoes

The first thing we do every morning is pile into Mommy and Daddy's bed. Mya drinks a box of milk, Enzo has a bottle, and somewhere in between I sneak sips of coffee.

Antonio delivers the beverages so we can stay warm and cozy. Today when he left to go to work Mya exlaimed, "Have fun Daddy! We'll have fun TooooNIiiiight!"

Enzo has about 10 minutes in the bed before he MUST get downstairs to play. Mya, in the meantime, has taken off her socks and observed me as I put on my slippers. Enzo and I make it downstairs first and as we stand on the tile floor she asks, "Is the floor cold, Mommy?"

I inform her, "Yes, it is. Your slippers are right there, or you can put your socks back on."

"No thanks, I want to wear high shoes."

A Breakthrough!

Mya gets easily frustrated with Enzo when he won't play doctor, or knocks over her block structure, or turns off the TV.

Day after day I turn blue in the face explaining to her that he is still a baby and learning that he is frustrating you. I have given her "permission" to feel frustrated as long as she doesn't hurt him.

Also, she can bark, "STOP, Enzo DAVID!" As long as she follows with what she wants him to stop doing, and asks me for help if she needs someone to step in.

Today I was typing an email and they were playing 5 feet from me. I heard the following come from this sweet girls mouth, "Ennnzooooo, ughhhhhh! Why are you doing this? That makes me mad when you knock this down. Mommy, I need help!"

Wow, she really is listening to me!

Sigh of Relief

The last few months I have been blessed with some new friendships in a group of women who have built their families through transracial adoption.

We meet once a month to discuss a book we are reading and hash out our insecurities, brag about our children, talk hair, and boost each other's confidence. Overall, it is one of my favorite evenings of the month.

Mya is usually still awake when the ladies arrive. Antonio dutifully gets her to bed but she always needs a goodnight kiss. I am more than willing to end her day with a kiss, and she always provides me with a good story to tell when I get back down stairs.

Last month she said, "Mommy, you come back in here after your girlfriends leave." Where did she learn to call them my girlfriends? I asked Antonio, and it wasn't him!

Last night she said she wanted to say a prayer. I said, "Great who do you want to pray for?" She replied, "Your friends."

Aww, I naively thought she could sense the love and desire to do right by our children in the women chatting in our living room.

"Mya, what would you like to pray about for my friends?"

She took out her binky and said, "Dear God, I pray that Mommy's friends go home."

These new friendships have been such a sigh of relief for me, but having this amazing (and sassy) daughter who is part of the reason they came into my life, can only make me smile.